"These lips sure would taste better with some hair on 'em."
Staches make players better. This much we know. While perusing this highly excellent photo set of opening day at Citi Field (with some great pictures of D-Wright’s homerun) contemplate how a hairy upper lip could affect Wright’s performance for the better. Then, take a look at this spotlight piece in today’s New York Times in which Jose Reyes professes his desire to steal home like the late, great Jackie Robinson. Maybe Jose could sport a fine stache to compliment his chin whiskers, too.
Jose thanks heaven everyday for his sweet chin whiskers.
Did you know that David Wright drove in José Reyes 42 times last year? Did you know that that is the second highest figure for a pair of teammates in the last six years? Neil Best knows it. And did you know that the highest figure for teammates in the last six years is 49 by Gary Sheffield and Rafael Furcal in 2003 while playing for the hated Atlanta Braves? That cannot stand. David and José need to destroy that record. They need to be better hairmates.
You see, José knows the power of facial hair. The mustache isn’t his thing, though. We here at The Wright Stache firmly believe that you do not select your facial hair. Your facial hair selects you.
And José is a chin hair guy. That’s the way it was meant to be. And David is a mustache guy. We know this. And once he accept it, José’s chin pubes whiskers and David’s stache will be the most productive teammates in baseball history.
Don’t believe that facial hair is the key to teammate run production? Take a look at Sheffield and Furcal in that 2003 season.
Follow José’s lead, David. The mustache has chosen you. Answer the call.
Newsday
Links | Jose's Chin Pubes | 
April 15, 2009 11:40 am | 
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