Homerun Derby: Lo Duca-Stache

"This stache entitles me to have as many mistresses as I want, free of tabloid attention."

Today is the homerun derby, otherwise known as the kinda interesting event that happens the day before that collosal waste of time also known as the All-Star Game. When thinking of homerun derbies I’ll always think about our own D-Wright’s marvelous performance in the 2006 event, in which our hero put up a sparkling performance in Round 1 only to eventually be bested by 1 total homerun by Phillies slugger Ryan Howard. The pitcher tossing D-Wright those juicy, Italian meatballs? None other than Paul Lo Duca, a man whose fiery attitude and fiery mustache we know all too well.

Lo Duca, pictured at right in his much stachier Dodgers days, had one helluva stache — even when he shaved he had a sort of built in, 5 o’clock Guido shadow. I call BS on those who heralded Lo Duca’s arrival to the Mets as a “homecoming” — the guy only lived in Brooklyn from ages 0-2, for chrissakes — but the guy had heart and attitude, something the 2009 club sorely lacks. His fierce competitor’s spirit was no doubt due to his man-whiskers; perhaps David could learn a thing or two from the man who helped propel him to national glory on that fateful night in 2006!