Your mission: Photoshop together your best picture of David Wright sporting a Rollie Fingers-esque mustache. Once you’ve completed your masterpiece, send it in an email to contact [at] thewrightstache [dot] com (formatted like an actual email address of course…we wrote it that way to deter pesky spammers). We’ll post the best entries here on the site and let our fans pick the winner – who we’ll promptly mail the book to. We’ll accept entries up until Monday, June 29th.
Legendary Hall of Fame relief pitcher Rollie Fingers recently came out with a new book entitled Rollie’s Follies: A Hall of Fame Revue of Lists and Lore, Stories and Stats from Baseball’s Most Famous Moustache. The book is, like the title says, a collection of some of Rollie’s favorite stories and statistics that he learned of or experienced during his famed 17 year career in baseball. Besides being one of the greatest relief pitchers to ever play the game, Rollie easily solidified himself as having one of the greatest, if not the greatest mustache in baseball history. He kindly spoke with The Wright Stache’s very own Teufel Stubble about the new book, baseball, and of course…mustaches. Check out the conversation below:
TWS: Maybe we’ll start out talking about the book a bit. The book has a lot of anecdotes, the lighter side of baseball, players joking around and things like that. Do you have one favorite story from the book?
RF: Probably the one about striking out Johnny Bench in the World Series on the fake pitchout. Even today people come up to me and ask me “were you the guy pitching on the mound when Bench was hitting and you struck him out on the fake pitchout”. That story is in the book. Johnny and I are real good friends. I never bring it up to him unless he brings it up first. Read more »
…is always hanging out of his mouth. Why? We have no idea. But when we saw the recent shot of him licking a baseball batin Newsday earlier this week, we had to bring it to our readers’ attention. Here are some choice shots of David licking his lips and other things. The bat pic is on the bottom:
We love it when our readers send us tips regarding new mustache-related products (keep them coming!). Here are a few of our recent favorites:
If you already have a stache, the white mustache etched into these glasses will look fantastic stacked on top of yours. If you don’t have one (because you can’t grow one – like me), these will create the illusion of having one, if only for a brief moment while the glass is tilted at the perfect angle as you gulp. We’re going to buy like 100 of these and open a Wright Stache bar outside of Citi Field. Seriously. Thanks to good friend o’ the stache Marc S. for the tip.
12-Pack of Fake Mustaches
We’re broke (won’t you buy a t-shirt, please?). So when we learned that there was a 12 pack of fake mustaches going for $2.61 on these here Interwebs, we snatched up as many packs as we could. We then marched down to the SNY Studios building on 6th Avenue and demanded that random passers-by sport the staches on our lunch break. You should do the same. Thanks to both Bill F. and Nick K. for the tip.
These aren’t exactly in season, but they are awesome. I own four of them. The mustache is actually removable (it attaches with velcro)! If you’re hitting the slopes anytime soon, you best be rockin’ a Beard Head. You should also email them and demand that they make a blue/orange combo hat. Thanks to the Beard Head owner Dave S. for the heads up.
Yesterday, JCP and I took The Wright Stache to the Mets game, donning brand-spankin’ new Wright Stache T-Shirts for all to admire; JCP with his lovely girlfriend Emily, and I, Hairy Backman, with my Mother and Father in celebration of Mothers Day. Not only did we get to witness a proper sweeping of the lowly Pittsburgh Pirates on a beautiful Spring Day, but we were also able to spread the word of the Wright Stache on our backs; sparking both interest and excitement from Mets Fans of all corners of New York’s perfect ballpark, Citi Field. Check out these photos, courtesy of Mom (whose husband, my Dad, has sported an elite baseball mustache for the better part of his life…more on that in an upcoming post circa Father’s Day):
From AdFreak via Yahoo’s Big League Stew, this SNY promo clip of a fictional “Keith Hernandez Day” is simply brilliant. And of course, we love the fact that Yahoo’s ‘Duk is making the connection between David’s plate-woes and David’s lack-o-stache. We can’t say we disagree. Because we don’t.
So is this an indication that Metstache-fever is spreading quicker than the Swine Flu? With the repeated showings of our Mets Weekly segment on Citi Field’s Diamond Vision, along with this SNY produced clip…we’re thinking yes. Here it is:
Meet me at the hotel after the game. I'll bring the dye and curling irons, you bring the Lady GaGa Mixtape.
Speaking of haircuts, the Brewers’ J.J. Hardy and All-Star outfielder Corey Hart dyed their hair black together in an effort to break out of matching slumps. How cute. For Hardy, the move is largely nonsensical, considering his hair is already a dark brown-blackish. And for the naturally golden-blond Hart? It’s downright pathetic… and the mark of a true pansy. Unfortunately, for the sake of this post, it’s kind of working for Hart who has, since dying his hair on April 19th, raised his batting average from a meager .250 to a somewhat-more-respectable .278.
Here at The Wright Stache, we have but one question for the new Beautiful Boys of the Brewers: Are you guys joking? Major League Baseball players don’t cry. Major League Baseball players don’t polish their nails. And Major League Baseball players sure as hell don’t dye their hair black. Girls dye their hair black. Goth kids dye their hair black. Keith Hernandez dyes his hair black (but he gets millions to do so – so its OK).
Baseball is about playing tough – both physically and mentally. It’s about playing hard and battling through slumps, and not relying on gimmicks or trickery to be a better player. It’s about relentless passion and a drive to be better than your opponent, be it an opposing pitcher, or a batter trying to take you deep. And it’s about growing a damn mustache – the cornerstone of manliness and a true slice of Americana: just like apple pie, hot dogs, and Baseball itself.
J.J. and Corey: you’ve embarrassed your team and yourselves. Shave your heads immediately. That is all.
Ahoy, Mets Weekly viewers! We’re glad you found our segment on SNY interesting enough to google our cause and come see what The Wright Stache is all about. Come take a look around, won’t you? Here are some things that should help you get started:
And, of course, scroll through our older posts to catch up on what you’ve missed.
Come and visit us often. Without you, we’re just weird dudes who want David Wright to grow a mustache. With you, we’re a movement. Support the cause. Make The Wright Stache a part of your daily routine.
Yes, its true: movies teach us everything we need to know about life. From how to party in college, to what to do if we’re ever involved in a bank robbery, to why we should start smoking cigarettes immediately. They also teach us that mustaches are cool. Other than baseball, nothing has showcased mustaches better than the Movies. Sure, everyone knows that staches are equal parts charisma, sophistication, confidence, brawn, and intelligence all rolled into one neat little furry package. But the movies make them magical. So when David finally accepts his fate and decides to grow, here are the top 5 Movie Mustaches he can look towards for some inspiration:
5. Llewelyn Moss (played by Josh Brolin in No Country for Old Men)
In No Country For Old Men, Josh Brolin gave us a real-life Marlboro man. He was a true mustachioed, cigarette smoking cowboy that didn’t mind getting his hands dirty with whatever the job called for; be it motor oil (he was a mechanic), cow dung (I’m sure he wrangled cows at some point in his short life), or Mexican gangster blood. And when the going got tough, he wasn’t afraid to step up to the challenge and cap a few “sumbitches” or even a pitbull that was just about ready to tear into his jugular. In fact, Josh’s mustache was so effective, that it actually got cast in two other movies that year: American Gangster and In the Valley of Elah. So David, if you’re looking for brawn, then look no further than Josh Brolin.
Every once in a while, we feel the need to inform our readers of important new products in the mustache-marketplace (Read: please buy a TWS t-shirt!). So when we received an email from the creators of Stachetastic, a new iPhone application that lets users easily place realistic mustaches on photos of their choosing, we went bananas. Yup – BANANAS. And then we wrote this blog post.
And if that’s not enough of a ringing endorsement, take a gander at the photo to the right. Yup – that’s a real example of some of the excellent work Stachetastic can handle with ease. If you have an iPhone or iPod touch, and you enjoy wasting countless hours of your day painting fake mustaches on pictures of yourself or professional athletes, then head on over to the Stachetastic website to buy it immediately.
This morning, MetsBlog pointed out several stories from the Daily News, SNY, Bergen Record, and Newsday that claim that Luis Castillo is currently the best hitter on the Mets. He’s currently batting .389 on the season, and .444 with RISP, an area in which the Mets have lacked his season. This is great news for Mets fans, considering Luis’ struggles over the past couple of seasons and concerns as to whether or not he would have an impact this year.
Of course, its impossible to ignore the fact that Luis rocks facial hair. Because of his beard and connectors, we can’t officially call the growth on his face a mustache. But there’s no doubt that the face sweater he’s wearing on these cold April nights have helped him stay warm and continue to make contact with the ball. And similarly, the goatee-sporting Carlos Delgado has carried his hot streak from 2008 over into 2009, currently batting .304 with 3 home runs and 14 RBIs.
On the flip-side, our Golden Boy, David Wright, has been struggling at the plate with 15 strikeouts and a .289 average. As we pointed out in an earlier post, history shows us David tends to struggle in the colder months and surge in the warmer months of the baseball season. This season is shaping up to be no different, further reinforcing our point that the man needs to keep his face toasty if he wants his team to dominate the NL East.
Good morning to the fine and friendly readers of The Wright Stache. Today is Monday, April 13th. Tonight marks the Mets 2009 Home Opener at the brand spankin’ new Citi Field. Mets Legend Tom Seaver will be throwing the ceremonial first pitch tonight. And on the receiving end of that pitch? None other than the greatest catcher in Mets and Metstache history, Mike Piazza.
The blogosphere has been giving Mike a lot of junk lately, saying this and that about how he may have used steroids. We won’t take a position on that one way or another, because here at the ’stache, we stick to the real issues. And by real issues, I’m talkin’ Handlebar or Fu-Chu. Walrus or Imperial. Pencil-thin or Thick-as-Thieves. Ya dig?
Mike toyed with several different styles throughout his career before shaving it all off a couple of years ago. But we’re assuming (hoping) he pulled a surprise-growth for old times sake and shows it off at Citi tonight. If he does, we’re taking it as a symbolic tip-of-the-cap towards The Wright Stache movement.
This is the one and only time Dave was ever seen smiling.
Ahoy! Hairy B, here, checking in from USVI. The post you are about to read originally began as a fine edition to the Better Know a Metstache series. However, after making it through several paragraphs, I realized there weren’t many positive things to say about the fine stached stallion on the right. So, I decided it best to turn TS’s Sad Stache post about Bobby Bonilla into a series: The Sad Stache series, where we highlight low-points in Metstache history. So here goes.
Ever hear Tommy Lasorda’s expletive-filled rant that goes on and on and on about his “opinion” of a certain player’s performance? The certain player that he discusses, in response to a quickly-humbled reporter’s question had crushed three home run’s in that night’s game, sending the Dodgers to a 10-7 loss. That certain player was none other than the former Met lunatic, Dave Kingman. Famously waspish, but more importantly whiskered, Dave was a towering slugger who spent two separate stints with the Mets: one from 1975 to 1977, and the other from 1981 to 1983. Read more »
The Star Ledger / NJ.com is reporting that David Wright and Derek Jeter (formerly of the highly publicized World Baseball Classic BFF-fest) will be competing in a Batting Average-off of sorts. Whichever New York baseball heart-throb winds up with the lower batting average at the end of the 2009 season will lock up $100,000 for their charity. David’s Charity is the David Wright Foundation, which provides aid for children in need. The contest is being sponsored by Delta, who also owns a plane named after David.
Naturally, we think David is going to win this thing. Derek’s average has steadily declined over the past 3 seasons, while David’s will undoubtedly skyrocket after he grows his mustache. You see, folks, not only is growing a mustache good for winning a World Series…but it’s also good for saving the lives of children. And at the end of the day, isn’t that what its all about?
Once again: David Wright is a class act. Classy without a stache; Classier with one. Do it for the kids, David.
This photo came with a digital certificate of authenticity.
In one fell swoop of rebellion, drastic change, and unprecedentedly terrible timing, Keith Hernandez has shaved his mustache.
Credible sources are reporting that the former Mets first baseman, Just For Men spokesman, baseball commentator, and Sports Mustache Ambassador decided “it was just time for something different”. The shave ends a long-lasting love affair between Keith and his prized and furry lip cover that was once named The Greatest Mustache in Sports History. Last week, Mets fans even named it their Favorite Metstache of All Time.
Here at The Wright Stache, we’re obviously troubled by the news. This really could not have come at a worse time: just as our cause is beginning to build a steady buzz, our leader and “Patron Saint” has decided to call it quits. We can only hope that if and when Keith finds out about our mission, he’ll still agree to endorse David’s bid for the Stache House, and remind him that its the Mustache that makes the man, and not the other way around.
A selfless man never looks directly into a camera.
When considering Metstaches, its hard not to think about the bold staches that swiftly defeated opponents and lead the Mets to certain victory. Or the soothing ones – the staches that weathered the storms and put a team’s troubled mind at ease during burdensome times. Or the confident ones – the staches that seemed to escalate players’ abilities and ooze charisma to scarily contagious levels.
But the one Metstache that is oft-overlooked and seldom recognized as a stache of greatness is the selfless stache. And no one wore it better than Wally Backman.
Born Walter Wayne Backman, Wally began his Major League career in 1980 with the New York Mets. His success as a player came from his hustle, hard-nosed work ethic and a desire to play alongside the players that were naturally more talented than he was. Wally’s motto was always “team first”, and it showed – in his words, his play, and his stache. In fact, his stache was so selfless, that in 1985, it lead the National League in sacrifice hits – 15 total. An impressive feat when considering the selfishness and materialism of a 1980s New York. Read more »
In a sad turn of events, the Mets have decided to release Jose Valentin. MetsBlog is reporting that the Mets have officially let go of the Former-Stache, Tony Armas Jr., and Junior Spivey. The move officially closes the door on the Mets chapter of Jose’s life, and possibly that of his life in the Bigs altogether.
You may remember that last week, we posted a Better Know a Metstache on Jose. In the post, we discussed how much we’d like to see Jose make the team this year. We felt as though he’d be a huge inspiration for David, and a positive influence on his hairy journey. Sadly, that’s not going to happen.
We’ll miss ya Jose. Keep on spreadin’ that porn-stache vibe of yours.
[caption id="attachment_768" align="alignright" width="250" caption="Back"][/caption]Here at The Wright Stache, we like to please you. Aside from our #1 goal, which is encouraging David Wright to grow a mustache, your needs are our top priorities.
So when you asked us to tackle the Giambi-stache debate head-on, we dove right in.
When you asked us to address Jose Valentin’s famed mustache and nickname, “The Stache”, we said, “Sure, why not?”
When you wanted The Wright Stache music, we looked to our talented musician-friends and said, “Let’s dance.”
And when you said you wanted some official The Wright Stache gear to help take our cause to the mean streets, we said, “Comin’ right up.”
And here it is: Presenting the official The Wright Stache T-Shirt. Made from only the finest of materials, and proudly displaying a symbol that will soon come to represent an emblem of hope, unity, and Mets history… the Wright Stache T-Shirt makes a great gift for any Mets fan. We’re officially accepting orders starting right now and will begin shipping these shirts on April 24, 2009.
So pick up a shirt while you can – the more of these things David can spot in the stands at Citi Field, the more he’ll know we’re all behind him and his brand new stache.
If you’re reading this, then you already know that mustache fever is sweeping the world of baseball. Not only are baseball fans all over New York pining for David Wright to get up and grow; many are growing one themselves.
And where there are baseball fans, there are fantasy baseball fans – many of whom are looking to tap the power of the stache to boost their Fantasy ‘09 rosters.
So to save all you crazy fantasy nerds (take no offense, friends: I am one of you) from having to sift through the Yahoo or ESPN player thumbnails for hours on end, weighing stats against stache – we did it for you. Here is a short list of some players you should highly consider if you want to get some facial hair in your lineup: Read more »
Ahoy, mates! Hairy B here, reporting from the WSHQ dialup connection.
We keep hearing about this iPhone thing. Apparently it’s like a computer that you can carry in your pocket and use to connect to the internets when you’re on the go. We’re not sure we really see the use for it, but we keep seeing guys watching porn with the damn things on the subway.
So, to cater to those types of guys and anyone else who is too lazy to use a regular computer and modem, we set up an iPhone version of The Wright Stache. Now when you’re at Citi Field this Summer and want to tell David why he should grow in person, you won’t have to read off of cue cards.
Do check it out, please – and God bless technology!