Wright Wreasons: Maneater Edition
by Teufel Stubble | April 8th, 2009
Naturally, Oates was always the outside spoon.
It’s time once again to focus on irrefutable reasons why David Wright should grow a mustache. This time around, we focus on music. It’s a scientific fact that we are all shaped by the song that is #1 on the Billboard charts on the day we’re born. How else would you explain my awesomeness if not for this? So, naturally, I was not the least bit surprised to learn that the #1 song in America on December 20, 1982 was none other than “Maneater” by Hall & Oates.
Clearly, John Oates’ dulcet tones, passionate songwriting and thick, luxurious stache shaped David Wright as a human being. “Maneater” was the biggest hit of the duo’s career and was number one for four straight weeks. They peaked just as David Wright crowned. Coincidence? Hardly.
To his credit, Daryl Hall was the Jose Reyes to Oates’ David Wright. Clearly, their chemistry was the same. They worked well together, played well together and made hit after hit together. Not sure which tandem I’m talking about anymore? No worries. I’m lost, too. Coincidence? Hardly.
At the end of the day, David Wright was born while “Maneater” and Hall & Oates dominated America. Thus, he was born to dominate. With a mustache.
So, David, our private eyes are watching you. Thinking of staying clean shaven? I can’t go for that. Grow the stache. You’ll make my dreams come true.
Tags: Hall & Oates, Maneater, Wright Wreasons
April 8, 2009 
By LadyMet, April 8, 2009 @ 12:36 pm
Love it!
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By Misopogon, April 9, 2009 @ 4:15 pm
Wow, I never thought to look this up before. Apparently, I’m Floyd’s Another Brick in the Wall. Awesome!
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